Global Warming Fan Club Garment-dyed Heavyweight Long-sleeve Shirt
SKU: 65380396907

Global Warming Fan Club Garment-dyed Heavyweight Long-sleeve Shirt

Sale price$34.20 Regular price$38.00
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Ships within 48 hours · Estimated delivery Jul 8 - Jul 13

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Description

Global Warming Fan Club Garment-dyed Heavyweight Long-sleeve ShirtListen, were from Minnesota, where winter tries to kill you every single year, so youll have to excuse us if were a little skeptical about the whole "Earth is getting too hot" thing. Too hot? Where?! Because I just spent 20 minutes scraping ice off my windshield with a debit card after my scraper snapped in half like a stale breadstick. Look, were not saying climate change isnt realwere just saying its really awesome. And were supposed to believe that

Listen, we’re from Minnesota, where winter tries to kill you every single year, so you’ll have to excuse us if we’re a little skeptical about the whole "Earth is getting too hot" thing. Too hot? Where?! Because I just spent 20 minutes scraping ice off my windshield with a debit card after my scraper snapped in half like a stale breadstick.

Look, we’re not saying climate change isn’t real—we’re just saying it’s really awesome.

 

And we’re supposed to believe that the same people who can’t fix potholes and think printing more money makes everything cheaper are suddenly the Masters of the Atmosphere™? Yeah, sure. Next, they’ll be telling us they can control hurricanes with a tax.

That brings us to this premium heavyweight long-sleeve—a must-have for any member of the Global Warming Fan Club, where we celebrate the grift, the hysteria, and the world’s most expensive virtue signal. The design features a poor polar bear adrift at sea, which, if we’re being honest, probably just swam out too far because he got distracted by a school of delicious, oily seals. But sure, let’s blame my pickup truck.

Printed on a thick, ultra-soft, garment-dyed cotton shirt, this long-sleeve is pre-shrunk and rugged enough to withstand both winter and sanctimonious lectures from that one guy in your office who just got a Tesla and won’t shut up about it.

Features & Specs:

100% premium ring-spun cotton – softer than the EPA’s definition of "science"
6.1 oz heavyweight fabric – built tougher than your local weatherman’s credibility
Garment-dyed & pre-shrunk – won’t shrink, unlike Arctic ice that has been "disappearing" since 1979
Relaxed fit – because the real climate crisis is the price of a gym membership
Twill-taped neck and shoulders – for durability, just in case Al Gore personally tries to rip it off you

Wear it to your next ice fishing trip, at Thanksgiving just to see which relatives flinch, or while you Google how many “climate deadlines” we’ve blown past since 1998. Either way, you’ll be cozy.

Get yours before they’re banned. 🐻‍❄️🔥

Features & Specs:

100% premium ring-spun cotton – soft enough to make you forget you’re freezing
6.1 oz heavyweight fabric – just like Grandma’s winter stew, built to last
Garment-dyed & pre-shrunk – won’t shrink, unlike our daylight hours in January
Relaxed fit – because let’s be honest, winter weight is a thing
Twill-taped neck and shoulders – extra reinforcement for when you’re hunched over, cursing the sky

Wear it to your next ice fishing trip, mandatory family gathering, or as a passive-aggressive jab at that one guy who insists “it’s just a cycle”. Either way, you’ll be comfortable, and that’s more than we can say for the bear.

Grab yours before they’re gone—just like our patience for winter. ❄️🔥

Size guide

  LENGTH (inches) CHEST (inches) SLEEVE LENGTH (inches)
S 26 ⅝ 31-34 31 ⅞
M 28 34-37 33 ¾
L 29 ¾ 38-41 36 ⅞
XL 30 ¾ 42-45 37 ¼
2XL 31 ⅝ 46-49 38 ¾
3XL 32 ½ 50-53 39 ¾
  LENGTH (cm) CHEST (cm) SLEEVE LENGTH (cm)
S 67.6 78.7-86.4 81
M 71.1 86.4-94 85.7
L 75.6 96.5-104.1 93.7
XL 78.1 106.7-114.3 94.6
2XL 80.3 116.8-124.5 98.4
3XL 82.6 127-134.6 101
Shipping Notes
  • Free Standard Shipping on $100+ Orders to the USA.
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Exchange/Return Notes
  • We offer a 30-day return/exchange service after receiving.
  • Final sale items are not eligible for returns or exchanges.
  • To process your return/exchange, please contact us at [email protected]
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SKU: 65380396907

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PrimoCat
Grantham, US
★★★★★ 5
Difficult to destroy. Bounce really high.
Style: Squeaker, Size: Small (2 Pack)
Bought as a gift for a friend's small dog who dismantles tennis balls. He loves them. I have many years of experience with the product (in a larger size) for my big dog. He always had one either in his mouth or near him. They are pretty much indestructible.
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Reviewed in the United States on May 13, 2026
M
Verified Purchase
Majesty
Lake Worth, US
★★★★★ 4
High quality, wish it was just a little smaller
Style: Squeaker, Size: Small (2 Pack)
Love these. My dogs would play ball all day if I let them. These are very durable and bouncy. Love that it’s washable. They would chew up the small “tennis” balls to pieces so I love that they can’t destroy these. My only criticism is I wish these were just a little smaller (like the size of the small Kong tennis balls). My dogs can carry it in their tiny mouths but they can’t get their mouth around it enough to chew it to get the squeaker to squeak, which is their favorite thing.
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Reviewed in the United States on January 5, 2026
C
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CA Goose
Lexington, US
★★★★★ 5
Perfect for little dogs
Style: Ultra, Size: Small (2 Pack)
Perfect size for my 13 pound chihuahua mix. Great bounce and quality feel. Definitely worth it.
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Reviewed in the United States on March 26, 2026
A
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Amazon Customer
Omaha, US
★★★★★ 5
The perfect ball for a small to medium dog.
Style: Ultra, Size: Small (2 Pack)
My dog's favorite ball. Perfect size for playing catch and return for a small dog. She loves to chew on the ball. Very durable she has not been able to shred the ball. A great entertainment value. This ball does not squeak.
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Reviewed in the United States on February 27, 2026
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Kristy Kelly
Draper, US
★★★★★ 5
High quality, dogs love them
Style: Ultra, Size: Medium (1 Pack)
My dogs are obsessed with these balls! We've had them for months and they're still good as new. High quality!
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Reviewed in the United States on April 5, 2026

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